Fucking Friends & Neighbors & Coworkers

May not be the best idea.
May not be the worst.

I guess we’ll see.

I don’t mean to cross boundaries. I just do. “I can’t keep my hands to myself” and evidently, I can’t keep my body to myself either.

I was taught to share with my friends & neighbors & coworkers! Yes, indeed, I do have a cup of sugar… I’m pretty generous that way.

Being divorced and sexually charged, but not ready to be in a committed relationship and sometimes feeling leery about the one night stand, has left me with a few unmet needs.

So I get by with a little help from my (guy) friends. And while I recognize the danger in crossing boundaries with boys and sharing fluids with friends, it somehow feels less risky, less lonely, more genuine.

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entry 1: My friend has wanted to fuck me since the moment he met me. There’s a lot of complicated stuff that goes with that. When I really think about it, it may be the worst idea (ever) but for now, the casual nature of it mixed with the care we have built up over the years – the knowledge we have about the other person’s life – the acceptance established makes it warm, safe and seriously satisfying.

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entry 2: Our decks almost touch. It was inevitable without a privacy fence not to become a part of one another’s lives. My neighbor is kind of a whore. And the kindest guy I’ve met in really long time. He calls me baby girl and is my children’s first stop in an emergency – as am I for his daughter. Having just broken up with his ex, he, like most, has a revolving door of women. He’s sexual. He’s more sexual than he is friendly but if you saw his tattoos, his crooked smile and heard the ways he calls me baby, you wouldn’t blame me for a goddamn minute.

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entry 3: We work closely together. The travel we do for our jobs is laced with excitement but also exhaustion, the typical conference-craze and haze working a trade show for 12 hours entails. The nights are ours and we cocktail at jazz clubs and share our life-dreams. We never stop talking; we never stop laughing. There is no one on this earth who energizes my spirit more than him and while personally, our sexual and physical attractions aren’t really the draw, I am pulled and persuaded by his passion for me.

Each COMES with certain perks and risks. Fucking friends and neighbors and coworkers…

May not be the best idea.
May not be the worst.

I guess we’ll see.

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